A little about me...
Single male and here are some quick answers.
No I dont live with mom, Yes I have all my teeth, No, I do not have a job that requires me to ask these questions,do you want paper or plastic, Yes I do drive a car, No my world doesn't revolve around sports center, Yes, I am housebroken, No, I dont eat foods that need to be super sized and Yes I can see my toes when I am standing and they’re not webbed, Yes I can leave the toilet seat down, YES I live in a small town, NO I did not marry my cousin, No I don’t eat squirrel stew .YES I have good credit and YES I know how to use spell check and YES you can have control of the T.V. remote.. YES the pic is current and real. The profile is funny and I have a wacky sense of humor that can be sarcastic, witty and sometimes dry, if you have smiled write to me.
OK so heres the obvious: be able to communicate without hitting me in the head with a frying pan, somebody who can make decisions and not get lost driving around Reno or does not live on their cell phone, can type complete sentences, must be able to laugh at yourself and have a sense of humor (bonus points). Please be upright and breathing and not flying on a broom, and by the way I don't work security at Toys R Us
About the one I'm looking for...
If you have this.. finger nails splitting, sunken eyes, cracked lips and a receding hairline.. Ok .. Zombie... "I get it".. please don't be in the witness protection program AND yes you need to have human DNA and PLEASE don't be missing a chromosome or have the I.Q the same as salad dressing. Oh and I play the bongos.. Yes I will make your toes curl and please dont tell me the last book you read.. was about green eggs and ham, and yes I will make you pancakes in the morning, and please don't live in the basement with your parents and do not have human remains in your back yard and oh please dont have a birthmark or a tattoo that has 666 on it, and if you need you some additional schooling , let me know
I'd just like to add...
I don't communicate while dodging frying pans .. I'm an outdoors guy and am up for anything/ hiking/camping/fishing (except streaking.. bad for the record) and I like roasting food on stick in my front yard, The book " 50 Shades of Gray" is not about my underwear .
I am highly allergic to the anything with Oprah's name on it and the OXYGEN channel .. I like to wear my cowboy hat in the morning, pull my socks up to my knees when I wear shorts and do the Salsa.. Oh PLEASE no arsenic in my food .. it hurts and please don't use preparation H for toothpaste. So if you like this profile... dinner for two and clothing is optional.
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